Bionic Mamas

you're not losing a vagina, you're gaining a son

Quickly: Resolved

14 Comments

Hear ye, hear ye.

Whereas I never seem to find time to write real posts these days, what with the Bean being the Bean, all not-sleeping and almost walking and wanting to play;

Whereas I’m still not done with last semester’s work, thanks to a collection of plagiarists I intend to hang from the yardarm;

Whereas the next semester comes creeping steadily nearer, with its late nights and new-course-related impostor syndrome;

Whereas I am horribly behind even on reading posts, let alone commenting on them;

Whereas I nevertheless miss you;

and

Whereas a short post is better than no post,

I hereby resolve to write more short posts, more frequently, even if I still have designs on several long-form ones.

Happy New Year, my dears.

Now back to scouring wikipedia, about.com, and for fuck’s sake even IMDB — IMDB! — for sentences my students did not write.

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14 thoughts on “Quickly: Resolved

  1. Aye! Looking forward to it!

  2. Glad to hear that people are out there catching the plagiarism. Somoene has to do it, and if it means you need to look at 900 bios of Demi Moore, I salute you.

  3. Oh, those horrible little monsters. How I loathe their lack of integrity. I hope you boil them all alive and fail them and then burn their faces off. I like your resolution. Much better than resolving to exercise more or be a better spouse or whatever bullshit I’ve got going on.

  4. When I was a TA I used to google sentences that sounded too good to be true. How can they believe you won’t find what they lifted off of Wikipedia?

    Anyway, I support your short post goal. Maybe I’ll try that too.

  5. Were you trying to excite me with all of these whereas clauses? If so, it worked.

  6. I teach students study skills. Every term, I tell them not to use Wikipedia as a primary source. Apparantly, according to the latest batch, this isn’t the same as telling them not to copy paragraphs of it wholesale. I tear my hair. I hope they all FAIL.

    • i plan to fail two and try to expel one. i’m sick of playing nice — i played nice early in the semester, and lo and behold, said student learned that she could do as she pleased. (it’s her i mean to expel.)

  7. YEA! Im super excited for the short post approach!

  8. The short post idea sounds like a plan. Maybe I’ll copy you.
    And I’m fascinated by the use of IMDB. Really? In an academic paper? It seems like they could at least find something more scholarly to plagarize…

  9. I had to google IMDB. When I found out what it meant, it made me happy that I had to google it. #1 sure sign that you’re a pathetic nerd, thank you very much.

    I feel your pain. Plagiarism sucks ass, and enforcing it doubly so. I’m glad you’re coming down on the two-time loser like a ton of bricks. I hope she learns a valuable life lesson to go with her expulsion papers.

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