Bionic Mamas

you're not losing a vagina, you're gaining a son

The Dating Game


A few people have commented on the timequake that struck my ticker recently. If you thought it went backwards for a few days, you’re not wrong.

When I first made the ticker, I was using the EDD I’d gotten from an IVF website. After all, I thought, no need to bring my LMP into this when I know *exactly* when I conceived, right? Egg Retrieval was CD 13 for me — the closest I’ve had to a “normal” cycle since I started charting — but the protocol says it’s CD 14 for all date-figuring purposes, so I went with that.
And then I joined up with the OB practice. And they only wanted to hear about when my last period started. (Let’s not even get into how the dang thing had the spottiest start ever and I wasn’t even sure when to start stims and I ended up calling the Baby Factory in a tizzy, ‘kay?) And they decided my EDD should be 3 days later than what I’d been thinking.
After some dithering, I’ve decided to go with their date. The word on the street from the lezzie-mamas and others who know for darn sure what day they conceived, thank you very much, not as if we’re just casually throwing spunk up in our business, is that having a date that’s a little later than you know is right is better than having an early date — that way, you buy a few days’ breathing room before people start pushing pitocin on you for being overdue. (I was doing all this reasoning before the specter of pre-term labor was raised at the nuchal, understand.)
So I’ve adjusted my ticker accordingly, even though it feels wrong to see the week number turn over on the wrong day of the week. (Those who know me from the IVP may notice that I left that ticker alone as a compromise to my view of truth.) I put off changing it for weeks, because I didn’t want to lose ground in the struggle to get past the time of highest miscarriage risk with my sanity intact. But I’m gradually forcing myself to practice belief that this bunny-bean will stick around, whether or not I remember every superstition I’ve invented.

7 thoughts on “The Dating Game

  1. So hear you. My EDD has changed in every single one of my very early ultrasounds. And they are all a couple days behind when I *should* have ovulated if the trigger worked in 36-ish hours. And I hear you, I'm already fighting for every stinking day. Ha!

  2. I can't wait to have that argument with my OB when I go in. Oops! Gotta go make that call! Anyway, my RE should be sending them all of my info, and the dates would only be 1 day apart. I remember one of my bloggy friends have a loooong debate because they put her nearly 2 weeks ahead based on a 28 day cycle, which she NEVER has. She won when the u/s was done. LOL. Either way, your little bean will arrive right when he or she is ready 🙂

  3. Too bad about the lost days, but hey, maybe it will be like when a flight departs late and then makes up time later. Maybe you'll make up so much time that the baby will be ready, like, three months early!

  4. Considering very few babies are born on their due date, it won't matter too much in the long run.

  5. Next time, if you're going to throw out something like “…not as if we're just casually throwing spunk up in our business…” please give a warning. Half-chewed chicken flew all over my computer screen when laughed. Thanks a lot. 🙂

  6. You know, I've had some edd confusion too. I gave myself an edd based on an online IVF dating calculator (and I entered it three different ways, date of egg retrieval, date of blast transfer, and something else I forget) and all three gave me what I'm using 3/21. But once at the RE, the PA doing my scan said it was 3/22 (looking at the wheely thing) and then when we got released, the paper said 3/19, which I KNOW can't be right. (But the paper also had the date of stim starting three days earlier, which is where I think the mistake came in.) Anyways, I just crossed it out on the paper I gave to my OB and wrote in 3/21. And they seemed to accept that point blank. So who knows? I feel like I've created a fraudulent date but at the same time a) with twins, does it even matter and b) we're only talking about the difference of 3-4 days here (3/19 to 3/22). No biggie. But you know…when it's trimester one and every day feels like a year…those days REALLY REALLY count!

    Okay, enough about me. THanks for explaining the switch. But I still think of you as 10 days ahead of me, not 7. 🙂

  7. That is really odd how they don't take into account that it was IVF. I guess a few days doesn't make much difference but it still seems odd.

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